Russ and I just waved the last bird out of the driveway to head back to his home and job and life three big states away.
We have enjoyed having time with family and especially having John home for a little longer than he usually is able to stay.
Goes without saying…it was nice having some young ones rambling around these four walls for a bit.
Tuesday morning Russ had left for work and John was sleeping. I was sitting at the desk in the office reading when I heard an odd thunk coming from the kitchen. Immediately my mind tried to figure out what it could be.
I mentally went over appliances eliminating all possibilities including the ice maker. Nothing would have produced that sound so my mind moved to the stack of dishes drying wondering if something had shifted.
No. That would have been more of a clink or a crash. This was a definite thud of something hitting metal and then I remembered.
When Russ left that morning I had pulled John’s car in the garage to warm it up a bit and I had brought a cup that had the frozen remains of a couple of inches of coffee in the bottom left over from the long drive several days before.
Knowing it would thaw and possibly leak in our garbage, I had turned the cup upside down to melt and drain.
The sound I heard was the perfect match for a chunk of ice dropping into our stainless steel sink as it loosened from the sides.
It made sense.
I could move on with my morning devotions knowing what the cause of the interruption had been.
We just naturally look for a reason for things that disrupt our every day life, don’t we?
It’s like if we know why or how something happened we can deal with it and move on.
But sometimes…no…actually quite often…the bumps that startle us do not make sense.
There are things that change the course of our trajectory and while we flounder for some reason that would have caused it, we realize it doesn’t matter what the catalyst was.
It doesn’t matter why the cells mutated or the driver ran the stop sign or the company we invested in failed.
Knowing why and how doesn’t change what.
What we will do to move forward into our new normal.
We simply must go on.
And that is where faith is tested and tried and nurtured.
2017 left most of us shaking our heads at some point and asking God to help us understand why this or that awful thing happened.
Maybe you got an answer or two. Some insight gleaned from the asking.
But most of the times I have asked those questions, the answers I got back included phrases about trust and waiting and hope deferred, but never answers to my why.
I got assurances of a God who knows and understands and identifies with my sorrow and my loss and my pain but who does not owe me anything in regard to an explanation.
Because His answers always are about Who.
Who He is and who He says we are.
In the midst of my questions, He reminds me His ways are higher than mine and that I am not to rely on my need to understand things.
He promises to heal our broken hearts and He binds our wounds in His love.
This world is not our home.
We are sojourners here.
Fellow travelers who are sharing the journey.
Making our way Home together.
Our God is faithful.
His patience is infinite while we ask our questions as if we could make sense of it all.
And He waits for us to simply know Him as His children.
One day all of this will pass away and you and I will be so busy worshipping and praising we will have no thought nor voice to ask why.
Hold fast to the Hope that is in you.
Even as you seek answers, seek wisdom and guidance in how to proceed as you lean ever harder into your Savior.
No matter what the circumstances are as we watch 2017 draw to a close, remember….
You are loved.
You are precious in His sight and your tears and your fears, your doubts and your questions, your surrender and your worship matter.
I look forward to continuing the journey with you in the coming year.
It is good and kind of God to give us each other so we don’t have to travel alone <3