I wanted to thank you for your prayers and kind words for knee/shoulder mess that I got myself into.
The surgery went well, the recovery has gone well.
So well, that when I went for my pre-op check up and check in/therapy for my shoulder both the doctor and the physical therapist made it a point to tell me that while there were improvements and I was doing remarkably well; the damage that has been done needs time to heal properly.
They said I would feel like I could do more than I should and to respect that this will take time.
I thought about how often this happens to us in a faith journey.
There is something ingrained deep in us that longs to be strong and independent. We get just enough of God and His help to get us up on our feet and we wave our good hand heavenward and say, basically, thank You God but I’m doing great and I can take it from here.
Only we forget that the sin nature and the fallen state of creation are still alive and well.
And before long…or maybe it takes several years…we realize that we are not doing so well.
Old aches and pains that we thought were resolved surface and once again we are back on our knees (if we can get down on them) and asking God to bail us out. Help us figure what went wrong. Show me how to get back to being healed and whole, please.
He is so patient.
Time and again, He stoops down and scoops us up. Picture Jesus carrying that one lamb over His shoulders as He makes HIs way back to the flock.
I am thinking we don’t need to beat ourselves up because we seem to circle around in this pattern over the years. Instead I think our failure to continue to lean hard into God even when we are feeling strong, or particularly when we are feeling strong, is something that builds and develops our deeper walk of Fatih over the years. It reminds us that we are 100 percent human and He is 100 percent God.
At least I know it is true for me.
With quite a few turns around this world, I notice that while I do it less, I am still prone to trying to convince God that He can busy Himself with some other poor sinner because this girl has finally got her act together.
I am as thankful for His sense of humor as I am His grace.
This morning, with this post floating around in my head and feeling rather jaunty after my good report yesterday and a successful therapy and good night’s sleep, I caught my right toe on the bottom of the sliding blinds this morning.
The metal bar at the bottom was merciless and gave me no forgiveness. My knee jerked funny and my right arm instinctively jerked out to an unwelcome angle to try and catch my stumble. A sharp pain reminded me that I have miles to go before that shoulder can be used in all directions.
As I gathered my wits and headed to gingerly do the stretches that will bring about a strong shoulder, I had to laugh.
Thank You God for reminding me of my constant and eternal need for you. And for your love that always calls me back <3