Last Thursday was my day with the grands.
Our Graham started Kindergarten this year, so it is a different dynamic as the two younger ones have to be rousted from the sanctity of nap time in order for us to get a good spot in the car pool queue.
Then it is home to burn off energy until mom returns and we figure out dinner and baths and Lola’s imminent departure.
We had an extra twist last week, as Emmett’s preschool was having a family picnic to kick off the school year.
Rachel was running late getting home, so we were a bit scattered as she switched from work mode to mom mode.
Shoes needed to be found, bathroom necessities covered and all the chaos that ensues when you are rounding up three boys for an outing.
I ran upstairs to get my phone off the charger as Graham took his turn in the potty and Rachel went out to get Joel in his car seat.
I came down to Graham climbing into his car seat, tearfully defending some offense as Rachel continued to load up bags, kids and such.
Since I was long ago labeled his “Attorney”, I began to try and decipher what had happened.
Apparently, as he was finishing washing his hands, he heard the garage door and came out. He didn’t see his mom on the other side of the van and somehow surmised we all had left without him.
In a panic, thinking we were in my car, he had run out into the driveway to try and catch us.
He was more upset with the idea that we would have left without him then he was for getting reprimanded.
As I buckled him in, I asked him if he thought we would really ever leave without him and somber eyes nodded yes.
I wasn’t hurt or offended.
I didn’t feel misjudged or misunderstood.
Instead my heart was flooded with love and compassion for him.
The most important thing at that moment to me was to reassure him to remember how much he is loved.
With gentleness, I reminded him of the character of his mommy and me – that we love him and that we would never leave the house and go off without him or his brothers.
I told him that I understood how it looked, but at all times he needed to remember and trust the love we have for him and who he knows we are and how we always take care of him.
As I reminded him of all of these things, and hugged him in that awkward, kid-in-a-carseat way…he began to relax and nod his head and smile and hug back.
And yes….as I looked deeply into the eyes of this child I love so fiercely…
I did not miss for one moment my heavenly Father whispering…
“Just like Me, with you, My child.”
There are quite a lot of us today, me included, who are perhaps tempted to think that God has somehow driven off with the rest of the family and left us behind.
All I can say is what I told Graham…
You know Him.
You know His character.
You know His history with you.
So even when it looks like He has gone off without you, you have to trust in His love and wait until you can see Him again.
I pray today that you would know His embrace and reassurance of His love in the midst of whatever you are walking through.
He has promised to never leave us….never forsake us…He is faithful <3