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Continuation of yesterday…and that big question…Lord, what happened here??

I am beginning to remember why I was hesitant to tackle this topic back in October.

It requires you all showing up each day and following the thread of the message…so if you just arrived today and none of this makes sense, we are in the midst of a small series found in the Categories section at the bottom of this page called Deep Healing 2018. If you click on that link it will take you to the rest of the posts on this subject.

And now for some thoughts based on our look at the demise of Saul’s Kingdom and the ripping apart of his relationship with Samuel.

As a necessary note, the accounts of the prophets and Kings of Israel have far more significance in the grand scheme of God’s plan than helping me deal with life hurts.


1 Timothy 3:16 tells us that the Bible is God-breathed and useful for correction, training and teaching…so with that in mind I invite you to meditate on applying the passages we covered here.

We are told only a few details about Samuel after he finishes what God told Saul to do, basically dethrones Saul and walks away from the man he had been called to anoint as King against his better judgment.

<3 Samuel went back home and never saw Saul again alive on planet earth

<3 Despite all of his disappointment in the man, he mourned for him

<3 The LORD regretted that He had made Saul king over Israel

So we can fill in the blanks of all of that with our own stories.

And in that place we can ask some questions that perhaps Samuel asked.

And we can ask them over and over as many times as it takes until we get through to where we can start hearing God speak into the situation…or at least into our hearts.

I would imagine that Samuel may have asked repeatedly some things like….

Why did we do that?

Didn’t I say at the start that this was a bad idea?

Did I do something wrong?

Did I hear You incorrectly?

I can imagine that Samuel worked through the details of how it all transpired from the very start of the people asking for a King.

I wonder if he blamed the people, and God, and himself and most assuredly Saul.

I think that he might have beat himself up a time or two wondering if he had arrived sooner or worded the commands of God better that maybe Saul wouldn’t have messed up.

Perhaps he remembered some of Saul’s better characteristics and mannerisms and conversations that had been good and precious and had etched a place in his heart for this young man.

Maybe having failed at raising his own sons in a godly way to follow his footsteps, he had banked on this second chance to redeem the loss of those relationships and had come to think of Saul as a son.

Even as he well understood the flaws that had not only ruined God’s plan but broken his own heart, this old man mourned the loss of Saul.

And as I am familiar with some of those questions and going over of events and asking God where He was, and hashing over the “what-if’s” in a churning of the mind and spirit; I can also imagine that God met Him in each of those sessions.

For He has met me.

Sometimes He listens while I rant and sometimes He speaks a word of encouragement or a word of hope.

And sometimes He just holds me as a child and lets me cry as He presses a nail-scarred hand against my heart to stop the bleeding.

I love that we are also told the LORD regretted that He had made Saul king over Israel.

Oh, I don’t think God slapped His forehead and sighed…

Whoops…well, I sure didn’t see that coming…

But it gives me insight that people do make choices – that while God is Sovereign and what He purposes to do, He will do…we have some responsibility to work it out down here.

That God CAN ordain a relationship, but that a human can mess up God’s best plan and God is moved by the pain it causes.

By our choices we can be part of the story, or cut off.

Which means that even someone who hides on the day of his coronation had the potential to be the kind of king God would raise up to lead His people.

If only…

and it is sad when the one who God tapped on the shoulder to fulfill a calling in our own lives abdicates through disobedience.

It hurts.

And we mourn.

And God is with us in that.

So we mourn honestly.

And we grieve completely and openly.

But always, always…in fellowship with the God who loves us…loves that one who wounded us…died for all of us…that we might live in Him <3

That’s a bit more to chew on today…and I hope you will come back tomorrow.

Blessings on your tender hearts as you apply God’s Word to your “if only” <3

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