Category Archives: Relationships

Another day in paradise <3

It was an early start to a full day with the band of brothers and their wanna-be sister. We hit the ground running with Caroline greeting me at my car door and Graham starting into a science kit. 

We were gradually joined by the other two and we have finished our foray into the grand world of slime circuits, played play-do, walked the dog and are currently playing in the blow up pool because hey….the day is young and we have miles to go before we sleep. As in…it’s only 10 A.M.

After nap we are planning on painting these plaster of Paris dinosaurs we molded on Tuesday.

Wow…I sound like this organized, crafty, prepared grandma and I am anything but that. 

Activities rarely go the way I thought and I am not loosy-goosey about messes and letting little hands fumble to learn, but I press down my own control freak tendencies and bite my tongue a lot and sometimes forget to bite my tongue and have to apologize for a harsh tone with these little cherubs who are so tightly wrapped in my heart sometimes I can’t even breathe. 

So on the way here this morning, I spent a good portion of the driving time, like I do every time, praying for patience and for God to pour His love into me and for me to show them His love in ways they can understand. 

And as I was praying and thinking through the various things ahead, I thought about those dinosaurs carefully packed in layers of paper towel. When we made them on Tuesday, we discovered that the dry powder begins to harden super fast and as I mentioned…clumsy little learning fingers don’t always make for the most perfect projects. 

I also thought about hard hearts. 

Don’t ask me why. It’s just how my brain works and puts threads of ideas together. 

God promised to remove hearts of stone and replace with hearts of flesh. He didn’t mean hearts that crave the sins of the flesh, of course, but a soft, beating, blood pumping, possible to literally feel like it is exploding or bursting or breaking when certain emotions fill the soul…that kind of heart. 

Rather than a cold, stoney, unfeeling, unbending, unmovable heart of marble or rock or granite or whatever you would associate with a stone. 

As I drove and tried to think why I would have these two thoughts come into my brain at the same time, I pictured us trying to work quickly to fill those molds before the goop hardened and couldn’t be used. 

I thought of how the soft powder went into the cup but as we dribbled water in and stirred, it began to meld and then quickly become solid. Where as God breathes air into the dust of our humanity, the world adds the substance that will set it hard and immovable. 

I thought how I can start out a day with a soft and refined heart, fresh off of reading Scripture and praying and communing and doing some study. But from there other things are introduced into me. My humanity runs into other people’s humanity and we crash.

Old memories, new confrontations, interruptions that mess up the flow, an upsetting bit of news, misunderstandings, derailed plans, a rude driver, being passed over, another rejection…fill in the blank. 

I get frustrated, tired, hungry, confused. 

And I can being to feel a tightening in my chest. 

It’s a struggle but so important to recognize it as the beginnings of hardening. 

God also tells us to guard our hearts because it is from our heart that the well springs of life flow. Unless you are Moses and God tells you to strike a rock, water will never flow from hard glob of mineral deposits and grains of sand compounded together. 

The world we are living is well stocked with opportunity for you to suffer hardening of the heart. It will take vigilance and a desire to take in deep breaths of the Holy Spirit to keep your precious well spring primed with living water.

It is worth the effort. So worth the effort. 

Share and Save:


One of the things I miss from teaching Sunday school, besides the faces of our class and just spending time them and knowing what was on their prayer list currently, is sharing those moments in my quiet time where God teaches me something new and I want so badly to share it with everyone who will stand still long enough to listen.

Which was another great part about class, they were stuck in their seats and I could get the whole thing out before anyone could hit the door and make it to the stairs <3

So this week I was reading in my devotional and the text was regarding Jonathan and David and their friendship. The author brought me to a different vantage point on this relationship.

Eugene Peterson wrote the devotion and he always seems to cut to the marrow of the issues of Scripture and our application. 

Peterson says, “…friendship takes what is common in human experience and turns it into something holy.” 

He goes on to discuss this friendship between Jonathan and David in a way I had never quite thought of.

It’s a bit of a lopsided thing as Peterson points out what each brought to the table. 

I made a list and will share it here but because I never know what the format will look like in type on your screen, I am doing Jonathan first and then David. I would highly recommend getting a sheet of paper and doing a side by side of the two lists to help you really visualize this:

For Jonathan:

  • The friendship was complicated and risky
  • He willingly lost his own royal future
  • He lost his father’s favor
  • He discerned in David’s anointing God’s hand
  • He understood the danger
  • He entered into covenant relationship

For David:

  • This friendship was essential to him remaining in Saul’s service and surviving

That is all my paraphrase from Peterson’s writing.

Look at that for a minute. 

I have to say I have always looked at the friendship as in:

Lucky you, Jonathan. You got to be the Best Friend Forever of David, the man after God’s own heart. Pals with the guy who killed Goliath and was a national hero at a young age and oh, also managed a pretty impressive musical talent. 

But I look back over that list and I see, with fresh eyes opened, a young man who was in line for the throne and who loved God more than he loved his position, potential and power.

He saw God’s hand on David and he did the hard work of building a relationship based on sacrifice and obedience as a result. He assessed that this friendship was most likely going to cost a lot personally, but he rolled up his sleeves and he was all in. 

So often we enter into personal friendships and relationships because we want to.

We see something in a person that seems like they would be a good friend, someone to hang out with and do fun things together. Someone who will listen when we need to talk and give good advice and sure, we will listen to them, too, as long as it doesn’t drain us too much. We want to be there in times of need, but sometimes things get messier or costlier than we had anticipated and we feel like we are giving 80-90% with meager returns. 

What an example I see in this view of Jonathan and David.

What an opportunity to reevaluate friendship and see what God would have me be as He fills in the pros and cons of establishing covenant friendships.

Maybe God is calling me into some covenant relationships where I will have to take risks and lose some personal ground in order to be who God has called me to be for that individual. It makes me want to just gather up all my current friends and all my possible future friends and lift them up to God…set aside my rights and needs and let Him rule over those relationships in tangible ways.

I want to ask God for the David’s he would send my way that I would be open and receptive and obedient and NOT JEALOUS.

(And a side note…this was not a co-dependant or damaging relationship! This was a God-ordained relationship where both men were first in tune with God and then dealt with what life brought from that perspective of God first.)

Maybe I am someone’s David and that person  has willingly sacrificed some things be my friend because they saw God’s hand on me. Maybe I am not such a catch in the way I return to the relationship.

Maybe my friend who I love and rely on so much has a much longer list of what the friendship cost him or her.

How humbling.

Again, I kneel down with hands spread wide and thank God for the Jonathan’s He has placed that I just didn’t even realize were giving so much more than me. 

Blessings on you friends, you are loved and you are prayed over as I hit send.

More importantly, you are dearly loved and chosen by the God who made you. 

May the Lord guide and lead us in all of our relationships and may His anointing cover those He has ordained, whether we have much to give or are mostly on the receiving end of the relationship. <3

Share and Save:

Three Randoms for a Wednesday <3


While our Caroline is definitely a twin of her brother Emmett, there are some similarities I see when I look at her as if I am looking in a mirror dialed back 59 years. 

Her eyes, the blonde pig tails and the way you can’t leave her alone for a millisecond without her getting into something are evoking the exasperated voice of my mom who gave birth to me at aged 39 and I either kept her young or gave her gray hair or both. 

As I am researching methods for deterring rabbits from finishing off the new butterfly garden I started last week, I read about moth balls which brought to mind one of my mom’s favorite stories to tell about why she was half crazy and yes, gray haired under her blonde hairdo. 

The story goes that my dad had put moth balls out in the garden area and my 2 year old self was found playing with them. They were scattered hither and yon, my hands and face smelled like them (of course because the entire neighborhood probably smelled of them and good grief, what child would even want to be near one of those, let alone touch several of them???) 

According to the never-varying retelling of the event, she threatened me with all her artillery to ascertain if I had actually eaten one…to which I apparently just stared steadfastly into her panicked eyes and would not fess up or deny. 

So there was a trip to the base hospital and who knows what else happened and if I did, or if I didn’t…I lived to hear and then retell the story multiple times. And when our girl calls to tell us Caroline’s latest story…I do have to smile just a tad inside….


I think I can probably stop saying how I can’t believe it is June, because … gulp…it’s almost over. 

Summer snuck up on us because the usual sigh of relief that school is over and we can have more time at home kind of got upstaged by Covid house arrest. 

All the things we usually do when our days are free have been done except in cooler temps and now the summer stuff we thought we would do is canceled and in the midst of all of it our state is launching another new phase of reentry.

Head’s up to the powers that be…a lot of the state is a few laps ahead of you on that…so I’m not sure what we will be legally adding to our repertoire, but I am guessing whatever it is I will still be donning a mask for a good portion of it. 

And I think about how many times I hear and say how sick and tired I am of this. Then I remind myself that history books are full of people who endured much greater hardships and sacrifices and major inconveniences. I can also look around the country and the world and recognize that a whole lot of people deal with a whole lot more frustration than I am right now and I usually end up telling myself to buck up and quit whining. 

It usually works for a while.


I am putting together in my head some ideas for July posts.

We will definitely have our VBS this year and I have some fun stories to share about summer memories. 

I also am trying to put some ideas down for “How to Journal”…and wondering if you and I were sitting down together, what would you ask me about this discipline….

Please feel free to email, comment (I won’t post on blog) or send me a message on Facebook <3

So there you go. 

Wednesday randoms…and time to go fix lunch for the rest of the staff here at the office. 

Share and Save: