As we continue with our mini-series on prayer this week, I was (of course) praying about what to share and this memory came to mind so here is today’s thought.
At some point in one of our children’s lives around that lovely teen year stage, I was quite frustrated with some behavior that I deemed to be not at all in line with the character of Christ being formed in her.
She seemed to be picking up a habit of leaving out details that might incriminate her and turn the story towards her favor. There was a level of trust that was eroding and I didn’t like what I was seeing.
When my lectures made no dent into it, I went to the prayer closet (which happened to be our living room couch) and prayed fervently for God to help me with this continued bent of our daughter.
I typically find that pouring all the thoughts rattling around in my brain out first and then just being silent seems to work for my prayer life, so I told God all the ways I was concerned and the thing that I was seeing and then I detailed some examples…because you know me…never short on words.
And then I quieted my heart and listened for His counsel on how to move forward in correction and discipline and such.
Instead I heard a gently voice say….
Well Laura, you certainly have taught her well.
The voice of conviction hit hard and I recognized instantly my own ways of doing similar things that I had always justified.
It seems I learned early on that I do not like people being angry with me and so if I needed to repaint something I had down with colors that looked more favorable and pleasing to the authority figures in my life, I would do it.
I would pretty much do or say what was needed to avoid any kind of conflict and justify that they were “white lies”,but lies are not white. Ever.
In the moment of truth, I realized that I too, had a tendency to withhold information if I thought someone would be displeased with me. I wanted to always be presented in the best light.
Oh the ugly truth of it as I wept and asked God to help me turn from that kind of deception.
I realized that the root of my “white lies” was a fear of man. I didn’t want the authority figures in my life to be angry or upset with me. God worked into my heart the understanding that if I was living for Him and bowing only to Him, chances were improved that the authority figures in my life would also be pleased…
Even if they were not, for whatever reason, I would be pleasing in His sight and that is what my source of joy and my life.
So often prayer for someone we are struggling with reveals something in us that needs God’s touch. It’s the old…remove the plank from you eye so you can help the brother or sister or daughter or whoever with the splinter in their eye deal.
We are all works in progress and pray is the way God helps us to grown and be transformed.
Blessings on you as you continue to work out your own salvation with fear and trembling.
Hope you will finish this series with me tomorrow and that’s the honest truth <3