The magic of grand parenting and time <3
As you read last week, Russ and I traveled back to the town I spent the lion’s share of my youth growing up in. We moved there the summer before my fourth grade year.
My parents moved away after I graduated. While God answered my heart dream to be in one place for a long time and get to know people, the plan must not have been to return there for holidays and such for the rest of my adult life.
We have been back a few times for reunions or to show the kiddos where their mom had the bulk of her childhood years. I have a collage of memories from that season of life and on each return trip something will bubble to the surface to surprise and delight me.
This time it was a memory as we drove through the downtown one last time to make our way homeward on Sunday morning after the reunion.
As we passed through the main drag, I pointed out (for the third time that trip) where the Five and Dime had been. I refrained from mentioning that was where I would purchase my 35’s ( and by 35’s, I mean 45’s…sigh) for my record player. I do understand that some stories need a rest from time to time.
But in holding back the oft repeated fact from my files, another memory bubbled up.
One year my grandma on my dad’s side took a train from Washington State to come and visit us for an extended stay. We picked her up at the train station in Louisville and I can still remember us all standing on the platform looking for her to come off one of the cars.
At one point my dad alerted us to her coming down from the far end of the line of rail cars. Sure enough, here she came in her wool coat and hat, toting her suitcase along with the determination that characterized every ounce of her German self.
We loaded her in the car and took her back to our home an hour and a half south and I cherished every single day she stayed with us. I remember bits and pieces, but the memory that surfaced the morning we drove past the Five and Dime was the day she took me to our little downtown to explore the shoppes with me.
As we made our way in and out of the dime store, she paused and said she wanted to go back in and have me pick out a candy I liked. We looked at the bins of candy and I selected some sourballs as that was my favorite at the time.
She purchased a paper bag of them for me and we left.
I took forever to finish the bag because I was afraid the memory would fade if I didn’t have the tangible evidence of that day with her. The last few sugared and got stuck together and I finally had to part with them, but over the years that day with her has risen up in my memories and sweetened my life over and over again.
I have friends who are not close in proximity to their grandchildren like Russ and I are to ours.
They don’t get to do the every day things like drop off and pickup, fold laundry and make them put it away, remind them to do their reading and make grocery runs with them. They don’t know what drawer the socks are in or whose thermos is whose.
But I always try to assure them that in the mathematics of grand parenting, every memory is of equal value to a child.
I spent a lot of time with my mom’s mom and I treasure each memory that pops up. While there may be more in number because of the times we spent with her side of the family, if we were to weigh grandmother’s on a scale of the heart…they are both beautifully equal.
That is the magic of grandparenting, I think.
There is a blessedness to the love between a grandparent and grandchild. I have enjoyed the lingering of this memory of a brief moment with my grandma and I pray for those who feel distant in space today from their own grands to know how precious they are.
I would encourage anyone who is feeling too far away from a loved one today to send a real note or card in the mail, make a FaceTime call or reach out in some way to that child/teen/young adult and remind them how precious they are to you.
Always, always, we can sit in the quiet spaces and lift them in our prayers…which is the greatest gift we can pass along to the next generation <3