Wow…thank you so much for all the love and kind words of affirmation for Russ’s post yesterday. It means so much to both of us.
I am posting late yet again – because I hit up the grocery first thing this morning. We have been trying to go as little as possible and if those veggies and fruit weren’t so good for us, I could go less often…but that’s how it works.
I also gave blood. If you are able to but are concerned about the fear factor of not only the needles but the going in to a confined space, I would urge you to make an appointment.
Everyone has to be masked, you can do most of the registration and the questions online (the Rapid Pass comes in your email the morning of your appointment)
The receptionist basically baptized me by emersion in hand sanitizer and the people working with me kept applying it before they touched anything including their rubber gloves which they changed every thirty-seconds.
Even the snacks and bottled water were social distanced from each other…which may have been unnecessary but whatever.
And yes, I did sanitize my mini-oreo package and water bottle when I got home…and washed my hands before and after.
So if you can donate blood, check it out.
With this disclaimer…the needle is still the needle…so can’t help you with that.
Last little thought here is, I have had several super amazing people in my life tell me that they are numb right now.
They are worried about this because they are used to being engaged and loving and compassionate. They care about others and they pray, serve and encourage as a lifestyle.
And they feel numb and dispassionate at times.
So I am going to tell you what I told them. And it happens to be what I tell myself because I feel it too during these days.
We are tired.
We are hurting.
If we are not exhausting ourselves out there on the front lines and scared silly for our co-workers and ourselves and whoever we might be coming in contact with…we are home thinking about those people and exhausting ourselves in prayer and love.
We miss our friends and family that we cannot see even as we navigate 24/7 with the ones who share quarantine space with us.
Our contact (and I realize others are lonely and isolated without social media so that’s a whole other ball game…oh yes…that reminds me…we miss baseball) is via social media; which if anyone remembers is supposed to be limited to small doses or we become discontented and detached.
When we do go out, we see a lot of people in masks and they look scared and scary.
We are wearing masks.
We are smiling behind them, maybe but we get no response.
People we love and like and even people we don’t know take a big step back from us instead of moving toward us and even though our heads know why, our hearts recognize the old feeling of rejection.
We take big steps back from people and struggle with the conflict in our spirits because we want to approach and hug, so it feels mean and wrong to move away from them. Even if we all understand, it still leaves a mark on our souls.
We may sleep through the night, but on waking we are still not rested perhaps..and perhaps every morning as we reach for the alarm, we hope in our heart that Covid was just a bad dream.
It is bad. But it is not a dream.
So we get up and we face another day digging deep into those mercies that are new every morning.
We pray as people cross our minds.
We do the things we need to do.
We laugh when we can and let the tears fall when they pop up.
And we lean into God.
So if you are struggling, it’s ok.
We are grieving, we are disrupted, we are surrounded by too many voices saying too many conflicting things.
We love well and when others are hurting, we hurt.
So when you feel numb, please just rest.
Let God hold you and let Him remind you that you are but a child.
This isn’t being held up on your shoulders.
Your activity is not going to save the world.
So rest until He shows you the next one thing only you can do…and then do it.
You are loved <3